From the fullness of his grace we have all received one blessing after another. John 1:16

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

we will not be shaken.

Psalm 64
5 Yes, my soul, find rest in God;
   my hope comes from him.
6 Truly he is my rock and my salvation;
   he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.

Today was a really hard day for all of us.  When we arrived at the hospital, Dad was in and out of it, morphine still dripping into his veins, mumbling in his sleep, and needing oxygen.  Being in that room, seeing him like that, made me feel cold inside and I couldn't stop myself from shaking.

Mom, Melissa, Lura & I met with Dr. Reddy.  He is still waiting for the biopsy results from the tissue they took out of Dad's right leg last Friday.  He's hoping that will confirm his Angiosarcoma diagnosis.  He said that his main focus is to get Dad rehabilitated...up and to go to either inpatient rehab or home and then start chemotherapy.  He said he thinks it'll be about a month 'till that gets started.  That sounds way too far off for me.  He feels that Dad is too weak to move somewhere else right now.  (I wish we owned a helicopter!)  He does not object to getting a second opinion.  We talked about things like living wills, durable medical power of attorneys, hospice, comfort, quality of life...all necessary but none of which I imagined having to talk about so soon.  Dad doesn't want to know details so I won't put them on here (for now) but he's anxious for his girls to get working on getting a second opinion.  Lura told him we're already on it.

They took him off of morphine after I left and Lura said he was doing great.  He was awake, alert, sitting up in the bed.  He ate over half of a sandwich (which is alot for him right now) and then ate some of his dinner when they brought it.  Physical Therapy came in and did some in-room therapy with him and Lura said she couldn't believe how well he did.  His pain is mostly coming on the right side even though he just had surgery on the left side yesterday. 

So, for now, we will work on making contact with the doctors whose names have been given to us.  Tomorrow, I will speak with Dr. Reddy about who we want to see, who he thinks we should see, whether or not Dad needs to be seen or if we can simply send someone all of this information and have them make a decision based on that.  Please pray for wisdom and clear direction for all of us.  It seems to me as though Dad is ready to start fighting. 

Tonight (and I'm speaking here for my Mom & sisters, too) we are all exhausted.  We're tired, emotionally & physically.  We're craving more detailed answers with more hope and we're not getting that.  Yet again, in all of this, we have hope and rest in our God.  He is our rock, our fortress, our mighty salvation.  We will not be shaken.


  1. Love you sweetie and praying for all of you. So many love your family and are holding your Dad before the throne. Let us know if there is anything we can do to help...

  2. It's obviously the Lord doing His work in your lives as you wait, because your peace is not of this world. I can't help thinking as I read your words that your lives must seem like they are "on hold." I can only imagine that you are looking back at life before this strange diagnosis and thinking, "Wow, wish we could go back there!" All I know is that our God makes lemonade out of lemons. I will keep praying for wisdom, clarity, strength and peace. If I can do anything tangible, just say the word.
    Love you!

  3. dear heavenly father, please provide wise doctors to give a second opinion. please also provide solid rest, peace and comfort this night for all. thank you for all you have done and provided so far. please strengthen dick as he continues his recovery from surgery and give him strength to do well with the therapy. thank you for hearing our prayers, amen.

  4. This hymn came to mind...and I couldn't choose just one verse. I hope it will bring you some comfort. Praying this hymn for you.

    1. Jesus! I am resting, resting
    In the joy of what Thou art;
    I am finding out the greatness
    Of Thy loving heart.
    Thou hast bid me gaze upon Thee,
    And Thy beauty fills my soul,
    For, by Thy transforming power,
    Thou hast made me whole.

    ◦Jesus! I am resting, resting
    In the joy of what Thou art;
    I am finding out the greatness
    Of Thy loving heart.

    2. Oh, how great Thy loving kindness,
    Vaster, broader than the sea:
    Oh, how marvelous Thy goodness,
    Lavished all on me!
    Yes, I rest in Thee, Beloved,
    Know what wealth of grace is Thine,
    Know Thy certainty of promise,
    And have made it mine.

    3. Simply trusting Thee, Lord Jesus,
    I behold Thee as Thou art,
    And Thy love, so pure, so changeless,
    Satisfies my heart,
    Satisfies its deepest longings,
    Meets, supplies its every need,
    Compasseth me round with blessings,
    Thine is love indeed.

    4. Ever lift Thy face upon me,
    As I work and wait for Thee;
    Resting 'neath Thy smile, Lord Jesus,
    Earth's dark shadows flee.
    Brightness of my Father's glory,
    Sunshine of my Father's face,
    Keep me ever trusting, resting,
    Fill me with Thy grace.

  5. From what you have described since this all started, Andrea, I think your dad must be a very strong man. I hope that you and all your family find encouragement in that. Praying for you as you take one day at a time.

  6. My Dear,Yes there has been a snow day,but NO Rum Rum here,We are all speaking of you and your families,and so sad, we pray and will keep praying for all of you...we all hold you dear in our hearts every day,,,our thoughts and prayers are with you all... Love Larry Leona Chrissy Russ Lindsey Matt Mark Carrie and our family!God Bless

  7. Thanks for the update Andrea, Melissa filled me in today too. I drove home from her house, looking at the snow differently with your lastest news. Crazy how your perspective can change in a heartbeat. Praying for you guys. Can't wait to visit, but have to get over this cold first.